Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

There comes a point when you have been in an abusive relationship far too long and it doesn't matter what others think, you are going to argue, defend, lie, and even physically assault someone about your man/woman.  When you find yourself acting out of rage when someone is only trying to help, you are out of your mind!  For some reading this, someone may have even said, "You are crazy...what do you see in him?  Why do you put up with her, well you must be out of your mind, because I could never..."  A person in an abusive relationship has to one day look at that one in the mirror and come to the realization that he or she is in fact out of his or her mind to keep permitting someone to physically or verbally abuse, cheat, lie, steal, connive and do other evil things against he or she and his or her family. So how do you know, you are out of your mind in what you might consider a normal relationship? 1.  You argue more than you talk to one another and it is often abou

A new study on teen dating violence shows that later in life those who experienced bad relationships when young will most likely have substance abuse issues and other problems during adult years.  Parents pay attention to your children especially when a certain boy or girl's name keeps coming up! See here:  http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2012/12/07/teen-dating-violence-pediatrics/1749105/ or click here.

This website identifies the character of an abuser, but what is especially helpful are the comments.  To those of you who date, don't be so quick to accept any man or woman who seems to get close to you quickly (ie. less than a year).  He or she makes plans for the future (within weeks of knowing you), starts living over your home (within months --practically pushing his or her self on you), and desires to do much for you even when you can do for yourself.  Chances are, this person has some lingering emotional issues that have yet to show up. The Miracle Principle

Not ready to let go of a man who name-calls, hits, slams doors, and curses you when he doesn’t like what you say or do, why?   Well, for some women they simply stay because, “I’m not letting that b*tch he’s sleeping with have him!   He is the father of my kids,” says the abused woman.   Meanwhile, “the b*tch doesn’t “want” him, because she already had him and she isn’t much fond of him,” says her friend. You can clearly see from the opening paragraph there is dysfunction, illogical reasoning, and unnecessary drama.   But if you try to talk to someone who is going through something similar or if you are that person, there is no telling you that a man who cheats and disrespects you is not worth keeping.   Instead, you have to one day have an epiphany and realize that you can move on with your life without him.   Now presently your circumstances might not permit a mad dash for the door, but the idea is to start making your way to the door.   Come up with a plan to make your

Being in a relationship that is headed for break up isn't easy especially when children, finances, and other people and things are involved.  But people who have been victims or survivors of domestic violence know that the fight for freedom is well worth it and some battles you will win and others you might lose.  Your abusive partner might have a long history of lying, cheating and stealing whether the situations were little or big, his or her integrity is put into question often.  When feelings like this surface, you will need to test the spirits. People will claim that they love, trust, care, and want a future with you, but if deep inside you aren't convinced, it's time to get your hands dirty, it's time to ask the hard questions.   A partner or relative may or may not react negatively to your tests.  But you will never know about one's heart, true intentions, or thoughts when you have a closed mouth.  I learned this the hard way.  Having spent years listening

What you probably deal with in your home is probably something that I wouldn't tolerate in my own home.  Hi, I'm Nicholl McGuire, self-published author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate and other books. I thought that I would take this time to share some thoughts about relationship conflict and abuse.  Now, I know for some reading this, there is a thin line between love and hate especially when you have been abused.  I am one of those personalities that don't have much patience for foolishness and less patience when it comes to lies, half-truths, and a negative disposition from a partner whether it is about me or not.  So for me, being in a relationship is at times very challenging and there are those moments that I prefer to be left alone.  But for some, you can take a whole lot, can't you?! I have heard and read many stories online and I am thinking, "What I went through is nothing, compared to what others have gone through!"  Yet, we are all different

The Break Up Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate by Nicholl McGuire by nichollmcguire on SoundCloud - Create, record and share your sounds for free