Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

You can't spend any money without your partner knowing.  You are questioned about what you are doing with your money when he or she asks for some.  You are left feeling guilty when you take money that you have earned to buy something for yourself.  Anyone going through something like this is being controlled. When one is being controlled, he or she doesn't always know or feel like he or she is being controlled because some individuals just have a charming way of manipulating you into abiding by their rules.  If the rules are, "We tell each other everything including what we do with the money we spend..."  Then quite naturally one is going to go along to get along.  However, slowly but surely one relinquishes all power over to the one making the rules.  He or she loses his or herself into a partner's world that is dominated by a need to know everything.  A partner who is riddled with jealousy, insecurity, unresolved past issues, and more.  When the one being c

Let's face it. Our government sent thousands of men and women into battle. They didn't know what they were getting into when they arrived in Iraq. Of course we sympathize with them, and we pray night after night they come home safe. And when they do, everything is different. He or she has changed. They are not the same person you remember. Is it their fault? Why place blame, because we can certainly point fingers. But the bottom line here is that you will be affected one way or another upon their return, and a lot of times, it isn't positively. Short tempers. Anger. Resentment. Grieving for lost comrades. Why did the government send me there? Why is my life ruined? I can't cope with life now. My spouse or partner doesn't understand. Why did I get injured? I can't work now. My partner wants love and affection. I can't give it anymore. All I see is bloodshed. All I see is pain and anguish. No one understands. My life will never be the same. I wish I wou

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate A 21-year-old woman’s diary to stay or go By Nicholl McGuire Education, popularity, and beauty couldn’t keep a college student from choosing a man who had a terrible secret. In this poetic story, Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate, Nicholl McGuire tells of her struggle to stay or leave her abuser. Domestic violence reared its ugly head when Nicholl, a young college student, met a man ten years older back in 1996. In her first book, Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate , Nicholl struggles with whether she should stay or leave her abuser in a series of poems that chronicle her hellish nine-month experience. Her roller coaster ride of emotions in the book provide valuable insight on the struggles abused women face when making a decision to help or escape their abusers. “This book isn’t for the woman who has already left the relationship,” Nicholl says. “Instead, it’s for the woman who is contemplating on leaving the relationship and the woman w