Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

They never learn or you might be the one who is tempted into drinking or smoking yet again.  Far too many people don't realize they can avoid many relationship issues if they would simply stop partying.  But many of these couples met during times when inhibitions had been lowered by substance abuse.  The difficulty of letting go of destructive behaviors that damage their relationships is constant. "I know I shouldn't but I can't help it...I really wish I could stop drinking...I don't like what has become of our relationship, but...He only hits me when he is drunk...She is cool as long as she doesn't use drugs..." Holidays for some couples are not happy, peaceful, or good times, because they don't want to admit that the substances that they drink, snort, inject, or smoke are causing problems for not only them, but children and pets living in their homes and relatives who visit. If you are guilty of hurting your partner or others while under the i...

One's partner/boyfriend/spouse will one day be drunk soon and the excuse as to why he or she hurt you yet again will be, "I was drunk..."  Cheating, lying, kicking, slapping, choking, verbal insults, and other abusive things occur between some drunks and their victims.  So what does one do about it? Well for victims they stay.  Safety isn't high on their priority list because usually the next day, the drunk is back to his or her normal self.  The victims see their partners the next morning, when they appear to be somewhat coherent, and they either act like fools hurling insults about the night before, breaking things out of frustration, slamming doors, using silent treatment, bad-mouthing about the drunk to family and friends, etc. while excusing the behavior by staying.  Others might think deeply about why they tolerate the abusive drunks in their households for days, weeks, months, or even years while contemplating ending the relationship. If one is serious...

Tell me, does this describe someone you know? Some people who feel inferior use an addiction to try to overcome weaknesses, especially in times of increased stress or deep inner conflict. A person’s inner inferiority complex reveals itself in his or her actions such as addiction, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, child abuse, compulsive eating, blame and aggression among others. No successful person desires a destructive addiction. What people who choose addiction or abuse really want is the power and ability to create better lives. Fearing they do not have this power to improve their lives, you will hear these people use excuses and blame to justify their addiction and abuse and protect what little dignity they feel they have left. If you find yourself or others dealing with addiction or abuse, instead of justifying or blaming, ask the following questions: Do I really want healing and resolution for this addiction or abuse? Am I willing to improve myself to achieve healing? Do I realize I ca...

Alcohol abuse effects can be far-reaching and devastating. The effects of alcohol abuse not only have consequences for the drinker but those around her or him as well. Alcohol abuse effects can be both psychological and physical. Alcohol consumption causes changes in behavior. The physical effects of alcohol abuse can be experienced with as little as one or two drinks. Impaired judgment and coordination needed to operate a car safely may result in the drinker having an accident. Alcoholism is an illness where alcoholic beverage consumption is at a level that interferes with physical or mental health, and negatively impacts social, family or occupational responsibilities. Alcohol abusers are drinkers that may drink excessively at various times with resulting immediate alcohol abuse effects at the time of excess alcohol consumption. The immediate physical effects of alcohol abuse can be experienced as soon as ten minutes after drinking begins. With continued alcohol consumption on that o...