Saturday

In My Journey to Make Sense Out of Nonsense...

I learned a lot over the years about why I made some of the decisions I made--good, bad or otherwise when it came to my personal and professional lives, but I never saw myself so clearly until I read a book entitled, Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood.   If you ever wondered why it seems you care more about others than they do about you then this book may be for you especially if you are in a relationship that is more down these days than up.

We have all encountered some couples that we may have wished deep down inside that we could love like they do and we assume that all must be great in their worlds as compared to our own.   However, the truth is they have their challenges just like everyone else, but the difference is they don't allow them to influence things like their core beliefs, self-esteem, family structure, and other things pertinent to maintaining a great relationship with self and others.  They don't concern themselves with every little thing a partner says and does to the point that it makes them ill.  They aren't interested in being everything to their partner including: mother, father, teacher, counselor, etc.  But the woman who loves too much is always on the frontline doing any and everything her partner, family, in-laws and anyone else she claims to love.

I needed to read this book, because I felt that I was headed to a point of no return when it came to thinking about some past decisions I made that I am not happy about to this day.  I made up in my mind that I was going to go back to the drawing board and find out what is it about me that I tend to attract emotionally unavailable, distant, cold, and angry men.  I wanted to know why I seem to find a "project;" rather than a relationship.  Dysfunctional people and relationships have followed me for years at home and at work.  In my mind, the characteristics of dysfunctional people and settings are familiar and I sit back and make myself feel at home.  I somehow convince myself that, "everything is going to be alright" when it rarely is.

As much as we, women who love too much, want to help others see their flaws and how they affect our worlds, we must realize that we can talk until we are blue in the face, go overboard with doing nice things, and give our bodies away repeatedly to undeserving individuals, but until these people realize their "issues," they will not change.  It is up to us to change ourselves and create a kind of life that is in the best interest of ourselves. 

If you are interested in knowing if you too are a woman who loves too much, please click on the following link that will lead you to a list of characteristics.  Women Who Love Too Much

Nicholl McGuire

Please note:  I don't get anything for recommending the book.  I just hope that it will be a blessing to others, like it has blessed me thus far. 
God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.