Tuesday

7 Definite Signs Your Partner Couldn't Care Less About You

Abusive, controlling, selfish individuals or addicts are in a world all their own.  They aren't the least bit interested in what is going on with those around them unless their experiences impact their wallets, roof over their head, and other comforts that they enjoy.

Cross an abuser and he or she will not hesitate to show you just how much the thrill is gone, they could care less.  Some abusive men and women will show off their new partners or leave evidence that they are on the prowl just to anger you just as much as they feel you have upset them.  Oh these uncaring people, know how to fake concern when they aren't quite ready to give you up.

As long as you are willing to make them feel good again, you are a keeper, but when you don't, they reason, "Why should I give a d*mn?  My partner isn't doing anything that makes me feel special."  Despite all the time and money spent, requests addressed, abusive people couldn't care less.

Since actions speak louder than words, how do you know your partner doesn't care for you like he or she claims?

1) You are hurting, bruised, in pain, or bloody and he or she offers little or no assistance.  One's partner is more concerned about covering your wounds up or pushing you to put on a great act around others. The abuser is overly concerned about image and what others may think.

2)  You have spent most if not all of your money paying household bills, gifts for the family, etc. and he or she doesn't bother to ask any questions and will not help you out of debt.  He or she blames you ad tells you shouldn't have done those things if you expected some help.  The abuser ignores your concerns.

3)  Your partner ignores or ridicules you for being physically ill or emotionally upset.  In his or her eyes you are faking, over-the-top, or crazy.  Abusers don't consider their actions or inactions are catalysts as to why one would react or respond negatively to them.

4)  He or she doesn't bother to express genuine gratitude or appreciation and doesn't like it when you do some things for him or her.  No matter what you say or do your cold-hearted partner will sooner or later find fault with or without a smile.

5)  Your mate doesn't genuinely celebrate your achievements.  He or she puts on an act and you know it, but you overlook the lack of expression.

6)  When you go out with your partner, take a photo with him or her, or attempt to communicate, you can clearly see he or she is unhappy being with you.

7) From a family emergency to an accident, the abuser is more concerned about the inconvenience it has caused him or her, but doesn't show much concern for your well-being.

Abusive men and women rarely show care unless of course there are watchful eyes around.  They know how to fake tears, alter their voices, and behave as if they love their family very much, but those of us who have been abused by them know better.

Before you assume that an abuser really loves, respects, and appreciates you, think again!  Some of these men and women are masters at manipulating anyone into believing what they want--what you see isn't what you see and what you need isn't what you need like someone sincerely loving you for you.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Socially Sweet Privately Cruel Abusive Men, Too Much Too Soon Internet Dating Blues and She's Crazy.


Friday

Natural Disasters, Life Challenges and the Abuser

The inconveniences, money lacking, angry about outages, and more, an abusive man or woman is fuming on the inside about a threatening storm or one that has already passed.  People around him or her are watching him or her gradually lose it.  Knowing that the abuser needs assistance, he or she might be on his or her best behavior in front of others for a time before exploding one day on one's partner, children and/or pets. 

Controlling, selfish, jealous, temperamental, and raging abusers are difficult to ride a storm out with when all their comforts are pretty much gone.  Some become so bad that law enforcement has to step in which is actually a good thing because what victims dealt with behind closed doors is now in the open for all to see. This is a good time to move on with one's life in a relationship like this without the user and abuser.

National Domestic Violence Hotline

American Red Cross

Freddie Mac

Disaster Resources

Tax Relief

Those of you who are in emotionally and/or physically abusive relationships find yourself working overtime to calm your partners down, but sometimes all your appeasing does nothing more than aggravate the already irritated abusive one.  The best thing you can do is do your part to assist yourself and others in your family. 

Sometimes natural disasters and other life challenges are a blessing in disguise because people who you wouldn't ordinarily reach out to help you, you will during a tough time.  Something within a victim grows weary of carrying the emotional weight of an abusive partner and it is in that moment that one throws his or her hands up and walks away from all the drama or kicks the abuser out!  Too many battles will drive any one mad and when you are the one who is trying super hard to keep it together while the other is falling apart, you have to choose your battles.  

If you believe in a mighty God, then you know by now that storms show up not only to bring on destruction, but to awaken men and women up to the terrible reality they are living in beckoning them to do something about it.  Are you awake?

Nicholl McGuire, owner and contributor of this blog.
YouTube NM Enterprise 7
Face Your Foe
Messages for the Soul
God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.

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