Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate

Tips on Handling the Silent Treatment We have all heard about physical abuse where one hurts another by choking, slapping, hitting, and shoving. We also have heard about emotional abuse where one belittles another through name calling, withdrawing from intimacy, forgetting important dates, lying, cheating, etc. Well nonverbal abuse falls under the category of Psychological or Emotional Abuse as well. This type of abuse is defined as anguish, pain and distress through the use of nonverbal acts. For the purpose of this article we will focus only on the nonverbal acts the abuser uses in a relationship. There is no pushing, shoving, belittling, or name-calling. Instead, the abuser uses silence to control, manipulate, frustrate, anger, and confuse. What is interesting about the one who is using the silent treatment, he or she isn’t always aware that they are doing it which makes it even more challenging to draw his or her attention to the problem.   So how do you feel about...

You may have experienced the silent treatment. In case you aren't familiar with this type of abuse, it's when a man or woman walks around for days, weeks or even months upset about something and refuses to talk with you about what ails them. Sometimes it sneaks up on you and you don't have a clue what is going on with them. So you ask them repeatedly, "What's wrong?" And they either say, "nothing" or continue to make you feel there is something wrong without telling you what it is. The suspense kills you, eats you up inside and sometimes you feel as if you are walking on egg shells. There are times when you will play over and over in your head the last conversation you had, what you said, what he or she said, and still come up with nothing. Meanwhile, he or she continues to punish you with silence. They refuse to be affectionate. They act as if they want nothing to do with you, and even if they do want something from you, they will get it and then go...