If you want respect, you have to earn it, so the old adage goes. So here you are in a new dating relationship. You find that at times your date can be really disrespectful to others. It is only a matter of time that he is going to be angry with you. If you set him or her straight early, you will be showing him or her that if this person really wants to be with you, he or she can't curse you. There are other ways to address a matter besides name-calling, insulting, or jumping in someone's face. But where many new couples make their mistake is they allow their partners to say disrespectful things to them early on.
At first a date seems to be saying some harmless things and may even be joking. But then in time, the words become more threatening and at times he or she looks like their losing it. He calls her a few chose names and then she follows up with a few creative curse words. Before long, the couple is having a contest called, "Who can curse the loudest." These are obvious red flags that these two people may be dangerous for one another.
Respect yourself, don't allow any man or woman to disrespect you by telling your date early on in the relationship, "I don't respond to that name...I will not tolerate that kind of talk...I will not proceed in a relationship with you if you continue to talk to me like that."
As mentioned earlier, if this person loves you, he or she will respect your boundaries, but if he or she doesn't, this person will most likely say, "Well, we can break up... I don't want to be with you anyway." Someone who really wants you in his or her life will apologize and try hard not to disrespect you the next time.
Nicholl McGuire
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate
Based on a book with the same title written by Nicholl McGuire, this domestic and dating violence blog offers support to anyone who is laboring to love an emotionally or physically abusive partner. Feel free to explore numerous relationship and family issues. Please be advised to seek a professional for counsel on abuse. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling, domestic abuse, and teen dating violence. Please be advised this is a public blog.
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