Wednesday

When a Man Says He Doesn't Want Children, He Means It

Some victims of domestic violence assume that if they have a baby for an abusive man, then another and another that some how the man will change and life will get better.  But the truth is, it won't.  Abusive men, whether the silent type or physically violent, want obedience--power and control--from those they abuse.

One thing that many men can't control is a baby being born in this world--but they will try and some will successfully get their way.  A man, who is mentally unstable, doesn't ever want to feel powerless.  His need for control over any and all situations is an obsession and when a victim thinks she is somehow getting the upper hand by having a baby anyway, she puts herself at risk of being killed. 

Thoughts play over and over in his mind on how to get his victims to do as he wishes irregardless of how they and others may feel.
Pay attention to the man's expression when a woman announces she is pregnant.  Most abusive men either boldly show how much they resent the news or they fake excitement.  Others might be happy for one pregnancy, but not the next.

Then there are those men who enjoy the fact that they have dominance with each announcement, because for some they know their women will become more dependent on them.  Some men simply like the idea they will be fathers, but disdain the mothers.

An extreme example of the hate one man had about having yet another child (his third) is found in the following Washington Post article: She loved being a mother’: Pregnant woman executed for refusing abortion, family says

If you are in a relationship with a difficult man, take heed to abusive signs early on and avoid having children with an emotionally and/or physically abusive man or woman.  Children for many people are an added stressed and are not welcome by all.

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.