Staying with an Abuser - A Detrimental Choice that Affects All
Being angry with a person who chooses to stay with an abuser is wasted energy. Rather, one could redirect that anger toward a cause or passion that might help those who want to be helped.
When the abused chooses to stay with someone who is emotionally, spiritually and physically toxic, the victim's decision to stay affects everyone sooner or later.
The police officer who gets pulled away from one crime scene ends up at the front door of a couple who is out of control--more time could have been focused on a more pressing matter involving the death of someone's loved one. A neighborhood hears the frequent cries of a woman who is getting beaten yet again, nerves are tensed and some wonder if she might die at the hands of her abuser. Children watch parents in disbelief and wonder if mom and dad might hurt them during one of their fits of rage. A place of employment that is counting on an employee to show up ready for work deals with frequent call-offs and/or performance issues which makes it difficult to keep the victim/abuser employed. A church attempting to win souls for Christ doesn't have a good standing in the community when one of their leaders has a problem loving and caring for his family; therefore, people don't bother coming. With the negative impact of one choosing to stay with an abuser, society ends up footing bills.
Victims staying with abusers is not exclusively their issue, it is a community issue. This is why most people will not encourage the abused to stay with an abuser regardless of the following: years of marriage, wealth accumulated, religious affiliation, power, name recognition, etc. It would be nice if the emotionally damaging relationship would make it through life's storms, but many don't. Those couples that finally do settle down are just making it--getting by while awaiting for the day that a troubled partner will soon depart.
Choosing to stay with an abusive, controlling, or often angry mate is a choice that can keep family at a distance, rob one of the joy of children and grandchildren, cause emotional and physical issues for those witnessing the controlling behaviors while making loved ones and close friends pray to their heavenly Creator for a swift end to the madness.
Nicholl McGuire
When the abused chooses to stay with someone who is emotionally, spiritually and physically toxic, the victim's decision to stay affects everyone sooner or later.
The police officer who gets pulled away from one crime scene ends up at the front door of a couple who is out of control--more time could have been focused on a more pressing matter involving the death of someone's loved one. A neighborhood hears the frequent cries of a woman who is getting beaten yet again, nerves are tensed and some wonder if she might die at the hands of her abuser. Children watch parents in disbelief and wonder if mom and dad might hurt them during one of their fits of rage. A place of employment that is counting on an employee to show up ready for work deals with frequent call-offs and/or performance issues which makes it difficult to keep the victim/abuser employed. A church attempting to win souls for Christ doesn't have a good standing in the community when one of their leaders has a problem loving and caring for his family; therefore, people don't bother coming. With the negative impact of one choosing to stay with an abuser, society ends up footing bills.
Victims staying with abusers is not exclusively their issue, it is a community issue. This is why most people will not encourage the abused to stay with an abuser regardless of the following: years of marriage, wealth accumulated, religious affiliation, power, name recognition, etc. It would be nice if the emotionally damaging relationship would make it through life's storms, but many don't. Those couples that finally do settle down are just making it--getting by while awaiting for the day that a troubled partner will soon depart.
Choosing to stay with an abusive, controlling, or often angry mate is a choice that can keep family at a distance, rob one of the joy of children and grandchildren, cause emotional and physical issues for those witnessing the controlling behaviors while making loved ones and close friends pray to their heavenly Creator for a swift end to the madness.
Nicholl McGuire
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