Substance Abuse to Calm the Victim's Nerves

From smoking far too many cigarettes to shooting up drugs, the victim has learned to cope in a miserable relationship by running to a world where one's own mind has no pain, obligations, or rules.  The human being just is. 

Yet, in time substance abuse, like the devil, comes back to claim what it gave.  The body begins to fail, the worry and stresses of life return, and an abuser, who doesn't want to take any responsibility for abusing his or her partner, only complains and beats the victim up through words or fists yet again.

"You can't hold your liquor, idiot.  Why do you take so many drugs?  You that miserable, b*tch!"

Substance abuse comes in many forms.  Victims have redirected the abuse and placed it on to any pill, liquid, or other things that make him or her feel good.  However, being under the influence only makes the abuse worse and gives the abuser something to use against his or her victim later especially in family court.  No judge is going to award custody to a parent who has known substance abuse issues.

"See why I act the way I do, she's nothing more than a drunk!" an abusive partner yells.  "You notice all the pills he takes, that's why we fight.  Check out these photos." the controlling woman points out.  "I told you my partner was a weed messed up coke head!"  the abuser wins the pity from those who may know everything about the victim's substance abuse, but nothing about the abusive tactics he or she undergoes monthly, weekly or even daily.

Nicholl McGuire 

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.

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