This has gotten past the point of ridiculous. You are not naive and have always understood that all dating relationships have their ups and downs. That also includes a fair amount of arguing.
Everyone is different so there are bound to be occasional conflicts of opinion from time to time. That's how relationships work.
But your dating partner has gone off the charts one too many times for you to ignore it anymore. Irritated turns into anger very quickly and then they fly into a rage that at times is out of control. And yes on more than one occasion it has scared the daylights out of you. Afterwards they calm down and apologize profusely (or do they?) and promise you it will never happen again.
You've heard that before but it keeps happening and each time it gets a little more severe.
For some people in a relationship, they look at this as a challenge to overcome. They decide that they are strong enough to not only take it but give it back in full force if necessary. By standing up to the other person, they figure that eventually they will be able to change them.
And truthfully from time to time things work out exactly like that. Their spouse or dating partner wants to change and puts every effort into doing so. They still have the temper but they learn to handle it better.
But the key phrase is "want to change". Many people that blow their stack on a regular basis don't see anything wrong with it. As a matter of fact they think the problem is you.
If only you wouldn't "make" them act this way then they would never get angry. Don't fall for this line. You get upset too but that doesn't mean you fly into a rage when things don't go your way. Be on guard against this sort of blame shifting.
The bottom line is you may be dating a walking time bomb. You never know what is going to set them off, how long it will last or how far they will go. No matter how much you like the person it's not a good feeling to be constantly walking around on egg shells. Being on the defensive increases their power and makes you weaker.
And at what point will they get physical with you? Someone who is always a half a blink away from flipping out can decide in their minds that if they are justified heaping verbal abuse on you than maybe some bodily violence toward you is equally justified.
When they go off next time, call the police if you have too but do yourself a bigger favor pay attention to the warning signs and your own common sense before it ever gets to that point. You are in this dating relationship to enjoy the company not fear for your peace of mind and physical safety.
Article written by Daryl Campbell – The Relationship Tip – Despite our best intentions and efforts sometimes things just don’t work out. But there is a better way
Based on a book with the same title written by Nicholl McGuire, this domestic and dating violence blog offers support to anyone who is laboring to love an emotionally or physically abusive partner. Feel free to explore numerous relationship and family issues. Please be advised to seek a professional for counsel on abuse. Contributors are not all licensed or trained in relationship counseling, domestic abuse, and teen dating violence. Please be advised this is a public blog.
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