Loving Him More than You Love Yourself

What does it feel like for some women to love their men more than they love themselves?  Well, if we look around we can see what these ladies look like compared to those who are selfish.  Hair isn't always kept up.  Clothes are a bit outdated.  Bodies are not as fit as they once were (if ever).  Car dirty.  Yet, their men are the total opposite.  They look and smell good, thanks to the special ladies who buy and maintain the love in a loveless relationship.

The women who worship the ground that their men walk on usually don't look as good or better than their men.  Take for instance a relative or friend that you know who has been in a troubled relationship for years.  Notice how she looked when she was in love, now compare that to how she looks since the arguing, fussing and fighting showed up in the relationship.

Many hurt women are simply lovesick over their men.  It isn't the kind of "love" feeling that is like the early days of a relationship, but it is a periodic sickness in the pits of their stomachs, followed by headaches or some other uncomfortable feelings that show up within their bodies when in their partners' presence.

These abused ladies are tired of the relationship ups and downs and are visibly unhappy.  They have aged terribly since their first meeting with their once handsome mates.  Sure, these "I still love him even though he treats me wrongly" types will say everything is "okay," but the truth of the matter is, nothing really is good with the pair.  These abused women are trying harder than most women to remain faithful, supportive and caring toward their partners.  However, this proves difficult when they have been repeatedly yelled at, cursed, threatened, pushed, spit on, choked, cheated on, and more.

The deceptive journey of "...believing the angry man loves me just as much as I love him" continues.  The victim will continue to love her abuser more than herself.  She will fight his women for him.  Bail his broke a$$ out of jail.  Pay his bills.  The confused woman will make a fool of herself in front of family and friends just to prove her love when they say things like, "Why don't you leave his good-for-nothing...?"  Overworked and underpaid, the victim will max out credit cards just to put a smile on her man's face.  She will hold his hand or rub his back even when he doesn't want her touch.  She makes promises she keeps, while her man forgets what he has said to her.  "Oh, sorry honey, I forgot what day it was...your birthday, our anniversary, right?"

The statement "I love you" rolls off the victim's tongue with ease, while her abusive partner hesitates and mumbles something about "I like..I mean luv you, goodnight."

Laboring to love an abusive mate.

Nicholl McGuire

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.


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