Monday

Insincere Empathy - Abusive Men and Women Don't Care, Victims Care Too Much

Whether you have been abused or are going through a challenging relationship, if there is anything that can drive anyone crazy is when one's partner lacks empathy.

There are couples in this world, believe it or not, who sincerely care deeply about one another's hardships.  They attempt to ease each other's pain as much as possible.  "What can I do for you honey?  What do you need?  Let me hold you...I understand.  We will get through this..."  You will not only hear the sincerity in their voices, but notice just how genuine they are by their actions.  They treat you a bit differently than they typically do.  There is minimal disagreements.  Words are carefully chosen.  Needed space is given.  "I am here when you need me..." the kind gentleman or woman says.  But often angry, emotionally disturbed, or simply rude partners aren't making any adjustments in their personalities and will not be accommodating or understanding no matter what the situation is.  You lost a job, they eye roll.  You are grieving a loved one, they look away.  You share a tragic story, they sigh.  You talk about a dispute with a family member, they turn their backs.  When they realize they look bad, then they might rub your back, kiss your forehead, and tell you, "I'm sorry...it's okay...if you need anything, just call..."

Those of us who have been and are in crazy-making relationships know what it feels like to be mistreated by men and women who deem us unimportant, small, or just another fixture in a residence. You are there, but not there.  When called upon, "Help me with this...Can you do this for me?  Could you fix this.."  But then forgotten about once needs are met.  The abusive partner trains his or her victim, even when he or she feels down, not to look to her or him for empathy.  You supply their needs, but they don't supply yours.  Some of you in these situations are doing quite well appeasing your heartless mates.  You know your men or women could care less about your personal feelings about life, love, people, places, and things, and so you have learned not to share much unless you want your feelings to get hurt.  Some others still have yet to learn how to deal with their cold-blooded partners and so you argue or project your rage on to children, pets, relatives and friends, rather than accepting the fact that your selection in a mate does nothing for you mentally, physically and spiritually--he or she lacks empathy.  Therefore, like you are insignificant to him or her, you too feel like your mate is not that relevant to you either even though you might tell observers something different about your relationship.  Cut the act, you care too much!

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.

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