Wednesday

Getting Even Just Might Cost You - What are You Willing to Lose?

He lies, she cheats or vice versa.  They both found out about yet another secretive thing they did behind one another's backs.  One goes and cries on mother's shoulder, "I want a divorce...I hate her!  I'm taking the kids!"  The other sits with her lover, "He never did love me...You are so much better than he ever was!"  So the seed of revenge take root.  She wants to start parading her new beau around her jealous ex before the ink is dry on the divorce.  The husband thinks that showing off the new items that he bought with the joint savings account will shove it to her real good!  One day these acts of revenge will come back to haunt them.

Before one thinks about paying an emotionally and/or abusive mate back with a few "in your face" moves, you might want to think twice.  Not everyone is emotionally stable to handle venegeful tactics and there are those who will not hesitate to find a way to make their mates and the children suffer immensely if they should cross them.  If you thought that children couldn't be used in the game of revenge, think again.  Some hurting couples just don't think of how their nasty acts will affect children in the short and long term.  The last thing on their minds is that kids will endure much stress, resentment, bitterness, and more as a result of two adults who just can't seem to get it together whether in or out of the bed.

If you find that you are feeling tempted to hurt your emotionally and/or physically abusive partner, consider the following:

1.  What are you willing to give up or lose in the process?  Your soul (if you should murder), freedom (jail), children, home, vehicles, job, mutual friendships, business connections, etc.?

2.  Is it worth going after someone who has the capability of hurting you far worse than you could imagine since the individual has already demonstrated that he/she is heartless?

3.  How much money do you have saved up and how much time and energy do you have to get an attorney, private investigator, legal paperwork drafted up, a new place to stay, etc.?

4.  What things might your abusive partner do to children if you should decide to pay him or her back?  Take them out of the home to live elsewhere, use them to hurt you, abuse them, or leave them with you while he/she runs off with whoever?

There are many other things to think about when it comes to paying back a conniving lover or spouse, but do you really want to take things in your own hands?  For the believers, just a friendly reminder, "Vengeance is mine," saith the Lord.

God bless.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate, Laboring to Love Myself, and check out her new book Tell Me Mother You're Sorry exclusively on Blurb.com

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.