Tuesday

She's Young, But She's Not Stupid: Dating Older

Sometimes we assume that young women who date older men, must be naive, gullible, unintelligent etc.  But the truth is, they are smart.  They know what they want, they just don't know how to communicate it at times.  This comes with maturity.  A young woman must have some time to experience life, but when she is dating men much older, she is often feeling like she has to learn quickly or otherwise lose her mind, her man, and her behind!

Communication isn't just what the young woman says, but how she says it in her attire, associations, and what she does when she is not with an older man.  But problems in these relationships happen when an older man doesn't have the time, patience, or understanding when it comes to young women.

Some men have been raised by controlling mothers and fathers that rather beat a son, daughter, or even someone on the street into submission, then to explain much of anything.  When one is with a hot-tempered, older man, he expects a young woman to listen and do as he is told.  Although this doesn't sound good, and most wouldn't agree with what has been written, understand this is the mindset of a man who is often angry, impatient, irritable, and older. 

A young woman trades her intelligence for stupidity when she agrees to a controlling man's way of life. If he tells her, "Do as I say...Listen to me and there won't be any problems...You will do what I say...or else..." and other similar phrases, the young woman has a problem on her hands that she may recognize, but maybe not.  It is up to those around her, wiser than she is, to say something.  Guide her by the hand and have a long talk with her.  So the seeds in her mind and permit her to think about what she is doing.  No woman old or young should be subjected to this kind of abuse.  However, some individuals around her may be encouraging her to stay with a controlling, older man because they don't want her to live at the parent's home or somewhere else, the man provides gifts and money, he is trustworthy, or for many other reasons.  But no matter the reason, what these "enablers" are doing--those who are encouraging her to stay with him despite the red alert signs that tell her to leave--are putting her life and possibly others at risk.  Don't sit quietly, do something!

The young woman might say stupid things, act stupidly, but evidently she wasn't stupid when she started dating the older man.  There may be a lot going on with her that we don't know about, so before you leave her alone, consider this, she may be going through alot.

Nicholl McGuire

See http://tipsdatingoldermen.blogspot.com if you are dating someone older or younger.

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.

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