Refraining from Sex, Might Turn Into a Major Issue

Sex is a natural response to all of the positive feelings you might be having toward your partner.  Who doesn't want to show one's love and adoration while getting some personal benefits?  However, the lack of sex in any relationship can make one irritable, impatient and even angry.

There are those men and women who just don't do well in a sexless relationship especially if he or she is use to getting sex.  Some couples falsely assume that they can still operate in a once healthy relationship that has now had its share of challenges without zero affection.  This might work if both parties agree to a sexless partnership, but it doesn't work when one has his or her share of needs while the other doesn't.

A woman who had been in an abusive relationship for years shared with me times that she was abused simply because she wasn't in the mood nor had no sexual desire for her husband.  She said, "He would become angry...He beat me sometimes.  I made excuses not to have sex with him, because I knew he had been sleeping with others and I wasn't about to catch anything."

There are many abused women in relationships who feel like this woman.  Some women rather take the abuse then have sex.  Imagine how serious this impacts them psychologically?  The woman who I spoke to, had no desire to have an emotional connection to a man; therefore, she spent some moments in her life, after the ending of her marriage, having sex with a married man.  She reasoned, that it was okay, because he could never stay with her--he had responsibilities.

If you can't see the dysfunction in a similar relationship described previously and don't realize the importance of intimacy in a relationship whether with sex or without, then you may have already been emotionally (and physically) wounded.
 
When you are in an abusive relationship, it is normal not to want to have sex with some one who repeatedly upsets you.  You will have to strongly consider which do you want the most: love and freedom or hate and slavery (that is being a slave to someone else's desires while putting off your own).  The sooner you realize you can do better for your self with or without a partner, the faster you will be able to come out of a relationship such as this.

Keep in mind there are those healthy relationships that are sexless for various reasons, but being abused isn't one of them.  Know the difference before you compare your situation to others.