The Exterior Changed, Interior Not So Much
Posts
Should You Stay?
Sometimes people reach out to others wanting to know, "Should I just leave?" Of course you should if someone is abusing you or you simply feel like you can't go on with that person. But we advisers aren't in the hurting person's shoes. The one who can best answer that question is the one who has to live in that household each and everyday with that toxic guy or gal. If you are offended when someone "tells it like it is" then you most likely aren't ready to leave. Some victims simply can't handle the fact that they made a lousy choice when they married, had sex, or had a baby with a partner. So as long as you are defending, denying, and blaming, you won't leave--you are there to stay. Sometimes the abused isn't who or what you think. For years, I have posted my personal experiences and opinion about abusive relationships and for years people have come to this site and blindly scrolled through the entries pretending as if my bo...
When the Abuser Sets Children Up to Fail
The abusive one doesn't realize it but the wiring in the brain isn't connected right. Fight up against truth, talk down to those who are only trying to help, kick people when they are down, use violence to get one's point across...you might know someone like this, what's worse he or she is a mother or father. Past programming beckons the once victim turned abuser to keep the generational cycle of abuse going. "My Daddy said this...my Momma did that...We turned out alright. Kids nowadays are soft." the abuser boasts. Hit on his or her head, shoved down stairs, pushed into a wall, burned with cigarettes, called many names, beaten with sticks, belts or anything a parent could reach...and it was all okay. Well we live in a different time and if those parents were honest with themselves and with others, periodic thoughts don't come together in their minds in a rational way when it comes to parenting children. - They can't handle too much no...
On the Prowl - The Abusive One Looks for His Next Victim
He seeks his next target. By the time he is finished with her... His demands will cause her to lose the makeup, change her hairstyle, and stop dressing so nicely. Stress ages the beautiful one. Power and control suffocates love. Peace is a dream. Then on to his next victim. "It didn't work...she was this, she was that..." Socially Sweet, Privately Cruel Abusive Men Too Much, Too Soon Internet Dating Blues by Nicholl McGuire