Tuesday

"I Know He's Watching Me" When the Abuser Stalks His Victim

An abusive man can't resist stalking, talking or attempting to get near the victim long after the abusive experience. It seems that there is a tugging in his heart to want to make things right with just one more apology. Unfortunately, too many women allow themselves to be lulled in his arms only to be punished some more for walking away in the first place. Don't let it happen to you!

You may have said or heard women say, "If he hit me once, that is all it takes--I am outta there!" But the truth is that doesn't always happen. Whether it was a light push, a pull or something else he has done to the woman, she most likely reasons, "Well he was upset and I did push him to his limit a bit." How many times will she rationalize his actions and take the blame?

Unsuspecting women are drawn into abusive relationships, because their abusers are good actors. They know just what to say to keep her coming back for more whether more means in the bedroom, in his bank account, in his sports car, or in his nice house, she comes back.

The abuser may sincerely care about the victim for awhile until the next negative mood arises in him and now he is yelling, name-calling, slamming doors, throwing things or worse hurting her. When she makes up in her mind to leave--for good this time--that's when he watches her.

She is walking with a friend, he watches her. She goes in someone else's house, he watches her. She goes to work, he watches her and on and on and on until one day she confronts him and that's when he will throw up every place she has been and who she had been with. This is when things can get very ugly and dangerous not only for her, but anyone who associates with her.

When you know he is watching (stalking) you, do file a report with your local police. Also, get a copy of his photo and drop it off with security at your workplace. Lastly, tell family and friends when you see him and document the days and times, so that if you should appear in court, you will have a solid case.

Nicholl McGuire is the Author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate and the creator of this blog. To purchase a copy of her book please visit: Amazon.com or click on one of her image links to the right of this blog.

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God didn't put you with an abusive mate. Your flesh did.